I've had all the problems you lads are listing here, and I have fumed and cursed, and cried my eyes out to Rashidi, Cleon and the lot. But after about 5 seasons (on various games) I started to read up on everything those guys wrote about tactics.
So I started at the back and ran matches in full to see how my players moved and reacted, and slowly but surely a tactic began to emerge. I did this on a game I started with Anderlech, and it took me the first half of the season to get it "right", but then I hardly conceded at all in the second half of the season and went on to win the league. Now I'm in season 4 on this game.
In two seasons with Anderlecht I won the league twice and got a UEFA cup semifinal where I owned FC Bayern for two matches without scoring and lost on a 1-0 aggregate. I played about too much in the cups with poor players and never won those. After my season with the uefa cup semi, I got appointed to FC Bayern, won the league with some hefty 5-0 and 6-0 victories over Dortmund, Schalke and the likes. I won the UEFA cup, and lost the German cup final after yet again dominating, but wasting too many opportunities. Now, starting my 4th season I am head of Man Utd, and I'm sure as hell gonna win there as well!

In 3 seasons now I have a win percentage of just below 70% of my matches, I think.
So it is possible, and I'm not one of the tactical wizkids like Rashidi, Cleon, nonleague and those guys. Just your average, ****ed off gamer who had enuff of losing matches.
It does take more out of you though, to make succesful tactics, but then again, we have been nagging SI for more realism for nigh on 14 years now. My fear is that they have made it too demanding so as to alienate the "casual gamer", but after 12-13 years of this game I had become a casual gamer, and now I'm back to the good old anti-social gaming!