retired_bec8643

My mum's considered this. But the concern is that since he's gone to such obvious lengths to not be contacted, how would he feel if we did find him? My mum's not moved, and I have the same mobile number still, so if he wants to contact us he can.

It's not like he died, at least not back then, anyway. He actively disappeared - Left his job, sold his house, disconnected his phone. If he'd died then someone at his old house or old job would have known.

Good idea, but already tried that. The problem is threefold:
- He has quite a common full name
- There seem to be a good few semi-famous people with exactly the same name
- Even if I add "Newcastle" into the search, he has the exact same name as a local newspaper editor so I just get matches for every article that paper has ever churned out in the last decade. </BLOCKQUOTE>

tried facebook/friends reunited/faceparty etc and the like ? assuming you'd recognise him ofc long shot but might be able to find out there.

Alternatively you could apply to Jeremy Kyle to set up some kind of on air reunion where you get paid £300 to argue and hurl abuse at him.

retired_layne129

I'm some five to six inches taller than my parents, and look like my cousin (who is also taller than most of the family) and his old man...

BlueSky

My immediate family no, and most of my cousins (considering ive got about 50 of them ), we're all deadly alike.
2 of my cousins stand out, i havent seen one of them since i was about 10, he went off and did his own thing, heard hes getting married of recent. He doesnt come to family gatherings and is really quite quiet. Ive worked with people he has, apparently hes one of the funniest men alive.
The other cousin, died a few years ago from a herion OD. Only found out a few days ago his middle daughter met the same end a few weeks ago (she was my age) and no-one told the family to let them go to the funeral. Feel a little guilty i didnt go tbf.

retired_little.splash

your cousin doing a George Clooney imitation?

2boxers

i don't 'fit in' with most of my dads side of the family (ive got an auntie & uncle in NZ who are :cool: but really that's about it)-then again its more a conscious choice that they've finally started to realise plus i'd be very worried if i did

used to lie when i was younger to avoid 'family' parties & say i was ill up till i was about 14-then i just told them the truth "i cba going/coming",(i did go to my Dads 50th which tbh i regret going to but, i did manage to make it clear how i felt without 'a show') but i'd just end up sitting in the garden occasionally getting bothered and told to 'come in as they're cold' (well you go in then i'm not cold )

i say 'family' as they're more an excuse for my nan to throw a massive party & invite all her friends and say

"ooo look at me i'm a brilliant grandmother/mother look how much i love 'x' see how much i love them as ive spent loads on this"

when truthfully she's been a sh!t nan who thinks 'Love'=£££ and tbh the only things stopping me telling her that are i'm not copping the blame when she finally croaks (i still swear it will take someone lopping her head off with a claymore - she's had 9 'last Christmases' ffs) & i don't want to risk losing my auntie/uncle.

highlights from her include:
<LI> crying (yes crying) when i (very politely) said i didn't really want to go to McDonald's for a 17th birthday party ( 12-13 years before then-maybe but then again she had other grandkids)
<LI>my dad calling her up to come round & 'talk to me' because i'd finally had enough of him & stood up to him. her then thinking i would listen to her just because she's my nan-yeah if she'd acted like one i may have listened.
&
<LI> her being deluded enough to think she has any more of a sway with me (than above) now and trying to convince me that i don't really mean it when i say i want nothing more to do with my dad "oh don't say that you don't mean it" (tbh i'm quite surprised she didn't pull out the 'for me' card she did use "you know it upsets me when people don't get on" hmm wonder if she knows the cat didn't break her ornament while she was away but it was broke during a full on fight between two aunties, that might upset her )


yes this is horrid,no i'm not bothered if otf thinks i'm demonic,dead inside or just plain evil- i had a wonderful nan who for 12 years more than made up for the other one by spending time with me & my sister, going for walks with us & her dog/dogs and getting me hooked on sugar as her neighbour ran the sweetshop

I'll never forget the look of sheer joy on her face when we went there as surprise .its just a shame the wrong one died

retired_bec8643

Seriously it's probably me that doesn't fit in. No animosity or anything but i'm happier in my own company than being round family i've nothing in common with, just because they are family i don't feel the need to spend time with them. Do go to family does and stuff and have a good time but wouldn't socialise out of that with them, much rather spend any time i go out with friends as i've got stuff in common with them so more to talk about.

That said i get on fine with mum, sister, gran & one of my uncles.

retired_devecser

My family are all chavs and, well, I'm not. I have long hair which they all find quite funny.

Cream suit, Martini and cigarettes Does he slick his hair back?