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Think you're kinda missing the point somewhat. As far as mt grandad was concerned she didn't exist. Not a case of not letting her know to get back at her in terms of the cancer, it's was a case of him (not sure who this "they" is you are referring to) thinking she just didn't have a right to know about his life anymore. I know one of his brothers went along with it, together with the other sister, not sure about the others who are now dead.
My nan is doing what she thinks he would have wanted.
From what I can tell anyway.
10-24-2007, 02:16 PM
Moral dilemma of sorts. Long-ish read. Includes death though, if that helps. Post #22
i don't think your nan would do this out of spite or bitterness. she probably has a good enough reason of her own for not telling the sister, apart from it being her husband's last wishes. otherwise she would do.
10-24-2007, 02:18 PM
Moral dilemma of sorts. Long-ish read. Includes death though, if that helps. Post #23
The bloke's dead, he left no clear instructions about whether or not to tell her - the overwhelming default position has to be that the sister is told. You can't decide against that based on second-guessing and some mad murmerings of 'house'. Maybe he regretted not playing enough bingo.
10-24-2007, 02:22 PM
Moral dilemma of sorts. Long-ish read. Includes death though, if that helps. Post #25
Originally posted by Ando THFC:
The bloke's dead, he left no clear instructions about whether or not to tell her - the overwhelming default position has to be that the sister is told. You can't decide against that based on second-guessing and some mad murmerings of 'house'. Maybe he regretted not playing enough bingo.
Eh? Would not "I'm dying of cancer by you are not to tell my sister", at least give some kind of indication of his feelings on the matter? And the fact it's my nan deciding, who had lived with him for 60+ years and knows the situation?
Not sure if you are just attempting to make every post cutting/sarcastic for the sake of it. Gone from calling people turds to bingo, bit odd. As I've said, I am thinking that she does have some kind of right to know. But I'm not about to disregard everything that's happened in the past between them, nor neccersarily disregard the wishes of my nan, who as I've already said, believes she is doing what he wanted.
10-24-2007, 02:25 PM
Moral dilemma of sorts. Long-ish read. Includes death though, if that helps. Post #27
Originally posted by Herman Bloom:
<BLOCKQUOTE>Originally posted by mark g:
I don't know Ando. Is he on a wind up, or is he usually this much of a ******?
Normally posts in this manner in fairness, whatever the subject matter, not sure why I'm even going there with him. </BLOCKQUOTE>
Cos I'm talking sense. Your gran's whipped up this conspiracy theory about the sister's husband but it all boils down to greed.
You asked for advice and I gave my view - she should stop being selfish and tell her her brother's dead. Even if the bloke had specifically asked me not to, I would tell her because she has a right to know. Given that no such explicit request was made, the decision is even easier.
10-24-2007, 02:33 PM
Moral dilemma of sorts. Long-ish read. Includes death though, if that helps. Post #29
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