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After a few pints of the locals finest, I went home to have a chat with Frank and he sent me to Eastliegh of the Blue Square South league.
2007-2008 Blue Square South - Eastliegh
Board & Fans: Achieve a mid-table finish at the end of two years
Media prediction: 15th
After checking over the First-team squad I was pleased to see a few decent finds among the fifteen or so listed players. I went on over to the Reserve team and what to my surprise to find that I had an additional fifteen or so players. I start to sort through the contracts and it seems that my predecessor has left me well over 30 some-odd players with contracts lasting at least until the middle of next year.
President of the club tells me he’s giving me a hefty transfer budget but then gets a crazy look in his eyes and cackles with laughter as me mentions there’s no funds to use it. At least I have a weekly payroll to make a Blue Square Premier team jealous. J
On with the season eh!! With so many players to sort through I asked the ass-man to give me his thoughts on the best eleven. After performing very well in the friendly matches I had some hope for the team to possibly beat the boards expectations.
Unfortunately the season started bad and rolled down the dark slopes of relegation at a frightening pace. With a total of 10 points in 18 games we kept swapping in and out of the relegation zone. After a very disappointing start I needed to take a closer look at the Reserve and 18u’s to see if I could find some hope to salvage the season and more importantly, my job. At the beginning of the season I setup both squads with a slew of Friendly matches on a weekly basis to keep them in shape if I ever needed to pull from the ranks, well, much to my surprise I see a 16-year old striker who’s racked up 39 goals in 18 games. I quickly promote him to the First Team and also find a couple of decent mid-fielders who my Ass-Man seemed to overlook during the best eleven selection. In his first league appearance the ‘Phenom Striker’ tallies 4 goals and one assist. This kid is so fast that he could beat defenders running backwards. We go on a four game winning streak and the fans have stopped throwing things at me during and after games.
Season Results:
Played Won Dr Lst GF GA GD PTS
42 12 14 16 56 62 -6 50
2007-2008 Blue Square South - Eastliegh
Board & Fans: Achieve a mid-table finish
Media prediction: 12th
At the start of the season I earned a new nickname. Eastliegh’s Jack-the-Ripper because I ripped up around 30 contracts and the screams of kids and men alike were heard throughout the city when July 1st came around. It was the most pleasant thing I’d ever heard… (evil grin)
The club was so far in the money pit that I couldn’t see a way out and the board was not happy in regards of finances. The players I didn’t cut I re-negotiated their contracts to be a pittance of what they were making. All-in-all I used a fraction of the allowable weekly wage bill and was grudgingly admired by the most frugal of managers.
After last years ‘Goals Allowed’ result I felt I had to shore up the defense. I also found a youngster goalkeeper that watched one too many Star Wars films and pretended he was a Jedi in front of the net. Although his eccentric nature was a bit much the son-of-a-bitch had reflexes of a cat! First three games he picked up bonus money for clean sheets and went out and bought him self a toy light-saber as a good luck charm to keep in the net during games. Meanwhile the Phenom Striker picked up an injury early on in the season that would keep him out for almost half the year. Luckily I picked up an Old-Timer who was out of contract, I signed him up for a few pints after every game and he duly delivered while Jedi and his defenders kept the ball out of the net. Winning 1-0 or 2-1 was the norm until the Phenom came back from injury. At mid-season we were sitting in the upper echelon of the league, once the Phenom came back we hit the number one spot with a run of good games against top teams, while the top teams were losing to the scrubs. Unfortunately after one of our games, I was so delighted with the win I forgot to go to the dressing room and went straight to the pub to celebrate with the fans. Only to find out the next day my players thought I was right upset with their 4-0 win over the current 2nd place team! Needless to say morale dropped a bit and we slid down to the number 3 spot when season came to an end. Allowing a total of 15 goals in the last four games killed our Goals Allowed rating.
Playoffs came and we won the first round only to get destroyed by Billerclay 5-0 in the final. Finances are still brutal but were starting to make money every month.
Season Results:
Played Won Dr Lst GF GA GD PTS
42 28 3 11 101 54 +47 87
Result: 3rd Place
Phenom Striker scores 35 Goals, 11 Assists and 11 MoM in 26 Games.
Cups: Qualified for Setanta Shield then was promptly handed my ass in first round.
Notes: Turns out the Phenom Striker has a younger stepbrother that just joined our U18’s club. Quick AML is his name, he’ll be one to look out for next year.
2007-2008 Blue Square South - Eastliegh
Board & Fans: Respectable League Finish
Media prediction: 8th
I would be happy with a top half finish but felt we might do even better if we could stay healthy. Luckily enough we were blessed with very few injuries to the First Team. Quick AML turned out to be an amazing player and at the young age of 17 had other clubs starting to throw some offers my way for him. We were really hurting for some cash flow so when an offer coming in for twice of what he was worth (“Club is breaking the bank”) the Club President couldn’t let it go. Fortunately my scout found a quality AML available on loan, he was tired of scrambling on his Coca-Cola League 2 reserves team and decided to see if he could help us make a good run. We were also heavily tempted to part ways with our Jedi goalkeeper but I was very strict about keeping him. For some reason I couldn’t part ways with someone who did a dance with a light-saber in front of his home crowd every time he picked up a clean sheet.
The season went better than expected. I won’t go any further than to post up the season results to avoid bragging.
Season Results:
Played Won Dr Lst GF GA GD PTS
42 334 5 105 33 +72 103
Result: 1st Place. Promotion to Blue Square Premier
Cups: Horrendous
Notes: Phenom Striker wins Player of the Year Award and yours truly picked up Manager of the Year. Also, we’re starting to see daylight on finances, looks like we could finally be in the ‘black’ by start of next season!
Funny Note: A member of the AP asked if I felt my current squad could make it in the BSP, I replied by asking her. “Have you ever heard about Eastliegh’s Jack-the-Ripper?”
Eastliegh gets Jack-the-Ripper 
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