Peacemaker7

Traitor

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England's week

The game in Kiev was bound to be the toughest England would face in the group, with Finland, Armenia and Bosnia the other opponents, and a James Milner goal after 37 minutes was a great fillup. Sadly the lead lasted just 6 minutes before Skvortsov levelled, and Ukraine looked set to go in with momentum until Wayne Rooney popped up in injury time to restore our one goal advantage. A second half debut goal from Jermaine Defoe put the seal on a fine win, and thoughts turned to getting home and preparing for Bosnia at Wembley.

A broken leg suffered by Taylor between the matches was borderline disasterous, and when John Welsh also called off a reshuffle was required. The almost-fit Joe Cole was recalled and started on the left, whilst Glen Johnson moved over to right back and James McEveley slotted into the heart of defence.

An early Rooney goal set the team off in the right direction, and when Jermaine Jenas made it two after about half an hour the game was all but won. James Milner's second goal in two games sealed the win before half time, and the team was in cruise control. Joe Cole came off at half time, his work done, to be replaced by Boucif Wright, and the 89984 inside Wembley were treated to an entertaining second period, featuring another Milner goal and an effort from Defoe that left the frame of the goal reverberating for five minutes. An entertaining week to be an England fan!

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Kirkie 2014/15

The personnel isn't much different from last season, Moffat is back in the Scotland squad, Murray has his first cap (and a missed international penalty) and Ryan Milne and Bisjawit Dierickx are regular squad members, but remain uncapped, but at club level we're much of a muchness.

Aaron Dunn and Ed Ross are AGAIN the victims of long-term injuries, and cover has been brought in in the shape of Phethego Fraser of Hearts, a bargain buy, and the only other addition was Rangers' Tim Hamilton at £3.5m in defence. Dave Ross moved on to Lazio for £3.5m and Darren Smith made a Bosman move to Aberdeen, so we pretty much broke even.

Anton Eadie followed up his goalscoring form from last season by tearing up defences in his first few games this year. Two at both Killie and Ayr, four at home to Inverness and the only goals against Killie and Morton, along with a last minute equaliser at Ibrox meant he had scored in every one of our six league games, eleven goals in total, and we were two points clear of Hearts on 16 points to their 14. Already Ayr and Kilmarnock look set to repeat the relegation worries they faced last term, when Albion Rovers eventually went down, neither having won a match yet.

In the Champions League we've been grouped with Lyon, Real Sociedad and Besiktas, but the first match in France was a disappointment as we went down 2-0 to goals from Kim Jin Kyoo and 35-year-old Sidney Govou. Still, there are fifteen points still available, and we really believe we can make an impact on this competition this season. Time will tell if I am right or I am wrong.

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Sunday Mail Interview with Anton Eadie, January 2015

SM: So, Anton, you're firing on all cylinders once again: Kirkie champions elect, into the knockout stages of the Champions League, and you've passed thirty goals already.

AE: Aye, ken whit ah mean, ah'm jist daein ma joab like.

SM: Do you feel you can go all the way in the Champions League just as you did in the SPL and Scottish Cup last season?

AE: Aye, why the hell no'? We're f*cking fantastic.

SM: But seriously, Arsenal in Round Two is about as tough a draw as you could have got?

AE: Aye, and wance we pish oan they bástards, we'll skoosh the hale thing, like.

SM: The one low point last season was failing to retain your League Cup title, losing to Motherwell in the semis. Was that very disappointing?

AE: Whit the f*ck're you oan aboot man? We f*cking skooshed the f*cking league and won the cup for f*cks sake. Why'd we give a tóss aboot some wee pishy cup?

SM: Of course this season you're one of the more senior players at Kirkwall. Do you enjoy passing on your knowledge and experience to the younger players?

AE: Do ah f*ck! They wee c*nts are aye oan at me fur tae learn them how fur tae score sae mony goals. F*ck them, I'm no teachin them squat. They're aw efter ma place, like.

SM: Anton Eadie, Scotland international. Has a nice ring, but do you think it'll happen?

AE: It bliddy better, like, ah've goat a tenner oan it.

Peacemaker7

ROFLMFAO

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Kirkwall double-up, but league triumph overshadowed by European glory

A second successive SPL title was wrapped up by Iain Bartholomew's masterful Kirkwall Town side, again before the league split, but remarkably it was just about overshadowed by the ludicrous run of success the club has achieved in the Champions League this season.

After successfully negotiating a group containing Besiktas, Real Sociedad and Lyon with a game to spare - finishing as runners up to the Turks - and setting up an unwinnable second round tie with multiple-times winners Arsenal. The first leg at Highbury should have been a learning experience, but after Aliadiere scored the Orcadians had a glorious chance to level when referee Vazgen Meier awarded a penalty. Scotland international Winston Murray stepped up, but his effort was repelled by England #1 Adu Sunday Barnes. In the second half the play continued to flow towards Ryan Milne, embarrassingly removed from the Scotland squad a month after his first cap and dumped in the under 21s. Kirkwall weathered the storm though, and in the 81st minute a Brian Taylor free kick drew the sides level. The Kirkwall support were still celebrating that strike when Anton Eadie, having the season of a lifetime, stroked home a second away goal in injury time.

Despite that there was still a second leg to play in Kirkwall, and few held out hope that Kirkie's superb finish would be any more than a happy memory once it was over. Half an hour in though there was a stunned feeling around the ground as Anton Eadie stepped up to stroke home a penalty. By that time Callum Moffat had already made the aggregate score 3-1, and Arsenal seemed dead and buried. A second half double from Pawlak brought them to within a goal of victory, but when Domenico Messina sent off Kolo Touré in injury time the Gunners were out, and Kirkwall was alive with celebrations that lasted well into the night.

The Quarter Final draw was again a tough pairing, but after defeating Arsenal many believed Kirkwall were capable of defeating any opponent, but Porto were keen to dispel that and won the first leg in Portugal 1-0 thanks to a Cunha penalty early in the second half. The second leg began explosively as Eadie effectively restarted the tie with a fifth minute goal, and so it stood at half time. Throughout the second half everyone expected the Kirkwall bubble to burst, even after Eadie gave them the aggregate lead just after the hour mark. At that stage a single Porto goal would have been enough to eliminate the Scots, but when Lee Miller struck with nine minutes to go it was clear Kirkwall would progress, and history was in the making.

The semis saw Besiktas, who had won Kirkwall's group, travel to Orkney for the first leg, and any doubters who remained were blown away in an awesome six minute spell between 13 and 19 minutes where Biswajit Dierickx and Eadie, twice, made the score 3-0. A goal back for the Turks before half time gave something for the harshest skeptics to hold on to, but as Eadie completed his hat-trick, and Tom Brighton grabbed his first ever Champions League goal - not bad for a man many deemed not good enough for the Third Division - the tie seemed over. And so it proved as two Eadie goals in the first half in Istanbul, either side of an Osman strike, ensured the tie ended in a 7-2 aggregate win for the Scots.

Some facts were noted at this stage: Eadie's 13 goals in the competition were almost double the seven scored by Inter's Martins in second place in the scoring charts; despite having an injury ravaged squad for much of the season, striker Biswajit Dierickx is the only player registered for European competition who is unavailable for the final; captain Callum Moffat will lead the team out at Old Trafford then pack his bags for a Bosman move to First Division Hibernian; Anton Eadie's 48 goals in 51 games in all competitions this season is a club record.

Peacemaker7

Well done binny ... erm I mean Wag ...... erm.... erm, oh aye HD

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Kirkwall's Big Day

Despite ultimately falling short at the final hurdle, Kirkwall Town can be justifiably proud of their achievements this season. In reaching the final they became the first all-Scots squad to do so since Celtic in 1970, and their eventual 3-1 defeat to a classy Inter side was no disgrace. That the score remained 0-0 for an hour was a tremendous credit to Bartholomew's players, and Anton Eadie's goal was well deserved as time expired.

From the kick-off Inter Milan were a clearly superior side. Their passing play and incisiveness created chances by the handful, and Ryan Milne was far and away the busier goalkeeper. When Inter eventually did break through after an hour it was a goal that no defence would have stopped as Obafemi Martins latched onto Emre's through ball before slotting past Milne. Simone Perrotta added a second 13 minutes later, and as Kirkwall tried to rally they were floored when referee Kim Milton Nielsen awarded a very suspect penalty against Murray, allegedly for "jumping unfairly" with his opponent. Haim slotted home, and though Kirkwall threw everything at Dionisi they had only Eadie's trademark goal to show for their efforts. A valiant effort, but one made in a losing cause.

As to next year, it will be hard to see which teams can stop this Inter side. One or two of their players are reaching veteran status, but they have at least one more year in them. Kirkwall will be competitive again, but this year's miracle run is unlikely to be repeated. Time will tell, but this writer suspects Kirkie's chance to be legends has come and gone, or, as Anton Eadie would say, come and went.

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<pre class="ip-ubbcode-code-pre">Pos Team Pld Won Drn Lst For Ag G.D. Pts </pre><pre class="ip-ubbcode-code-pre">1st C Kirkwall 38 29 6 3 73 22 +51 93 </pre><pre class="ip-ubbcode-code-pre">2nd Hearts 38 18 16 4 83 40 +43 70 3rd Dunfermline 38 20 8 10 66 43 +23 68 4th Rangers 38 17 11 10 61 41 +20 62 5th Dundee Utd 38 17 9 12 43 40 +3 60 6th Motherwell 38 17 7 14 59 56 +3 58 7th Celtic 38 17 8 13 71 70 +1 59 8th Ayr 38 8 15 15 42 59 -17 39 9th Inverness C. Thistle 38 9 8 21 54 76 -22 35 10th Aberdeen 38 9 6 23 41 67 -26 33 11th Morton 38 8 8 22 43 72 -29 32 12th R Kilmarnock 38 5 6 27 44 94 -50 21 </pre>

Brian of Nazareth

Congratulations on all the league success you're having :thup: Tough luck in the CL. Better luck next time eh? You sure that England job isn't going to hinder yer chances of getting the Scottish one?