Raptor

A phonecall between Groningen and the US some time last November…

Raptor … So basically, that’s the plan for this year, it’s easiest to get to for everyone.

Mao Mark, Mark, Mark… Don’t you see it’s always the same? Edinburgh, Belfast, Glasgow… It’s the CMS Awards, not the Brit Awards… You have to take them elsewhere for a change.

R Hey, I looked into that, had several offers, and rang a few people across the globe myself. But nothing with enough glamour or history was available.

M You’ve been to Paris recently haven’t you?

R Hey, I may have made peace with half, the female half, of the French population, but that doesn’t mean I’ll let the CMS Awards become part of the Paris 2012 Bid.

M There’s a joke about you and Napoleon in there somewhere… Oh well, thought about Greece?

R They won Euro2004, had the Olympics, we shouldn’t spoil them with ANOTHER world class event.

M Madrid? Australia? Amsterdam?

R Madrid: I hear there’s problems with public transport. Melbourne would be an option if our man Down Under wasn’t too busy planning his honeymoon. 020: you’re joking right? I’d go to Germany first.

M Munich’s a good place to be this time of year.

R Actually, with my brother spending half the time in Germany nowadays, I had him check out Neunkirchen for me, but he stupidly mentioned benny, and no one dared to say another word. So Germany’s out too.

M I suppose even your wee village would do?

R Groningen? Get real. I’m lucky not to have been expelled following the CMS meetup in June. The city’s still recovering from that invasion. Besides, after the glass door incident, I couldn’t possibly show my face around there anymore.

M Glass door? Do tell…

R Talk to my lawyer instead. Other suggestions? And yes, I thought about Dublin, but they’ll get it in ’09, when Guinness celebrate 250 years in business.

M Elsewhere in the Southern Hemisphere? Cape Town, Rio, someplace warm.

R Halfway across the globe, no thanks. Besides, that’s not glamorous enough.

M And London is? Seriously Mark, if you want some glamour, AND a change from Britain, you should take the party Stateside.

R Hmm… I suppose with the dollar being as weak as it is, that might be a half-decent idea… Don’t have the contacts though, well, apart from you and this country boy. Actually tried New York, but Broadway started to laugh when I mentioned soccer. Ignorant c*nts.

M You’re talking about the wrong seaboard… East Coast is sooooo yesterday. You might as well host the Awards in Canada! No, if it’s glamour you want, the west is where it’s at.

R Hollywood?

M Oh please… and let people do 30-minute acceptance speeches? You usually drag out the ceremony for too long anyway. No, I’m talking about taking a leaf out of the Mao’s and hitting Vegas.

R I dunno… We’d have to dumb down the ceremony too much I reckon.

M Dumb down from what? Last year’s stuff was boring as f*ck. Not to mention unfunny. At least ’02 was half-decent, but then 13 wrote most of the script.

R And I suppose you can do better?

M No… I will do better. If you let me, of course.

R How?

M By putting up a real show Mark… by putting up a real show.

R Oh for god’s sake, if you think I’m gonna be dancing again, you’re greatly mistaken. There isn’t enough alcohol on the planet to get me that crazy again.

M It only took a pint and a half of shandy last time.

R Yeah well, the Irish taught me a thing or two about drinking since.

M Don’t worry, for a ceremony like this, we’ll get some real women to dance. None of you cross-dressing Europhiles.

R Why do I get the feeling I’m gonna regret what I’m about to say?

M I take it we’re in agreement then?

R I guess we are…


And so, Las Vegas became the setting for the final CMS Awards. But with life throwing up the weirdest, most unlikely meetings when you least expect it, the two intended hosts ran into Mark Frost and Stevie O’Mao at Logan International Airport in Boston, where the latter pair had arrived ahead of a Boston Hibs game. Boys being boys, they went out in town, met some more people, and got involved in some pretty weird conversations. By next morning, they still couldn’t decide whether the X-files-like stories they heard were true or not. The sudden change of weather to very heavy snowstorms added to the creepiness. Stuck in Boston, no flight would leave town any time soon, it was just as well they had mobile phones with, albeit very weak, some sort of signal. It was good enough to reach the two women currently at the door here at Ceasar’s Palace…

shannon2007

*waltzes in having won $1M dollars in the casino and sits near the free bar*

Mike..

<sits quietly in the corner due to the fact that he has no passport and has smuggled himself into the country>

shannon2007

Not fancy a go on the tables Flip

Mike..

Nope, I'm heading out to Vegas for a friend's wedding in 10 months time, I need to practise my willpower

retired_confal2

*staggers in with a pint of stout in his left hand and a smouldering herbal remedy cone in his right*

retired_hern1001

* wanders in totally knackered after running from a training camp in Limburg (Although it might well have been East Berlin)

Shermanez

Woo. Let's have some fun :cool:

retired_hunar_s

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Gino:
Woo. Let's have some fun :cool: <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Sadly, it'll be another seven years until I'm having fun. Well, four if they bring it back to Britain that year!

retired_hunar_s

*There you go*