*******Breaking News*******
In an extraordinary close season for the Championship, Paul Rouch has been named by the Crystal Palace board as Ian Dowie’s successor after the Toblerone headed one was sensationally dismissed.
Simon Jordan was quoted as saying “We are entering the clubs centenary year and we desperately want to get to the premiership this season, Ian has done a good job for us, but we felt now was the time for change, and the young Manger we have appointed has impressed me with his ideas and tactical nous. I am certain that Paul Rouch will guide us to promotion this season”
A Crystal Palace Supporters Club spokesman was surprised at the appointment of a new rookie manager and the manner of Ian Dowie’s dismissal “I can’t believe they let Dowie go after all his done for the club, and to appoint this unknown, well, I am gobsmacked”
Former Palace front man
Ian Wright was more forthcoming with his opinion “Its madness, Simon Jordan has lost the plot, who the feck is this Paul Rouch fella? What has he done in professional football before this eh? Its like giving the keys of your Ferrari to a 15 year old kid!”
Paul Rouch had this to say “I applied for this job because I feel that I have the tools required to get this club promoted. I have already identified some changes I will be making tactically, in training and also in the diets. I have a great squad of players here and with a little bit of strengthening we will be heading for promotion. I realise that this has come out of the blue, but I have inherited a great legacy from the work that Ian Dowie had already done, for which I thank him. Please do not judge me now, when I haven’t been given the chance to show you what this team is capable of, but at the end of the season when the results will speak for themselves”
Ian Dowie was unavailable for comment.
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