Unknown Scot takes over at Blackburn!!!!
In utterly sensational news it has emerged Mark Hughes has been kicked out of Ewood Park and sent back to Wales after being found guilty of trying to buy his way to a move to Manchester Utd where his heart really lies.
In his place is an unknown Scot with absolutely no managerial experience whatsoever in football and has never even played the game it has been reported. The Scot in question is Andy Hepburn, a 26 year old from Glasgow who decided to apply to be a football manager after doing so well in a computer game called Football Manager when he destroyed all in his path with every team in the game. He thought 'why not, if I can do it on the computer I can do it in real life.' He jokingly sent a CV around the globe in every football team in every major country and unbelievably Blackburn Rovers football club got in touch with him and even more amazingly appointed this guy as the manager!!!!!!!
We can now go live to Ewood Park where the news conference is taking place:
Reporter - This is a huge gamble Mr Hepburn, do you seriously belive you can pull this off?
Hepburn - Yeah I think I can, would not be here if I did not think I could. I got Staines Utd to the Champions League final in Football Manager so Blackburn with their squad should be a dawdle.
Reporter - Football Manager?
Hepburn - Aye a computer game I got for the PC. You should check it out it's class.
Reporter - Your basing your managerial expereince on a computer game? Son, are you mental?
Hepburn - Aye. I thought if I can do it on a computer so realistic then it should be the same in real life. Oh and no I not mental.
*Uncontrollable laughter filters round the press room* Reporter - Right ok then. So what are your plans for Blackburn Rovers then?
Hepburn - Total domination. I am gonna win the lot within the first couple of seasons and make Blackburn Rovers thee best club team in the world. Did I tell you I got Staines Utd to the final of the Champions League on Football Manager. What a team I had.
Reporter - Now your taking the ****. Who the hell are you and who is the real manager of Blackburn Rovers?
Hepburn - Me you numpty. Why do you not believe me? Honestly I gave up my previous job as a rocket scientist in Glasgow to move here to become manager!!!!!
Reporter - Ok mate your on drugs and we're out of here!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The press conference was just completely unbelievable. The press were all over Hepburn like a rash with his comments and life at Ewood Park this season could be very very interesting indeed. With what looks like an absolute crackpot in charge life will never be the same at Ewood.
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