The day of the big kick off arrived, and the players felt a bit strange to be playing on a Thursday. But that was the way of things in the strange land of Swe-den and they just had to get on with it. Except Olme, who for this week only, would be starring at a show near you on Saturday. For Vartan though, a trip to Goteborg to play Finlandia was their reward for having apparantly gained promotion last season. As usual Clayton gave a rousing speeching of bucks and coos and then the side, listening intently to their manager's instructions, went out and with just five minutes gone gave away the lead, albeit from the penalty spot.
'That was not what we wanted' Bert Merton shouted furiously at the players as Clayton flapped about the dug out in an agitated state, until the 4th official came over and asked Merton to please remove his pet inside.
'How DAWE you insult the glowious Mistuw Clayton! This..... THIS, is ouw managew! I will have you for wacism, bwatant wacism!'
Meanwhile, the match went on and although they were being outplayed in a large way, the reduction to ten men of Finlandia just seconds after taking the lead was having an effect. Slowly but surely Vartan were getting into the match and seven minutes from half time Flipsix3 fed a neat ball to right winger Blanklook who casually slotted the ball home and at half time the sides were level. Merton was happy, Clayton was squawking, and everything was much more rosy now as the sides headed out for the second half.
Three minutes into that half, Flipsix3 stole the ball from a dithering defender on the edge of the area, tried to dribble past another defender, the ball come off his shin, breaking off the defenders shin and then richoteting back to Flipsix3 who somehow toepoked the ball beyong a keeper who was rooted to the spot. It was one of the craziest goals you'll ever see, but they all count and Flippers was, of course, a very happy little bunny. Fifteen minutes later he was not so happy as Finlandia's ten men pulled level and when ten minutes from time the home side took the lead, there was uproar in the Vartan dugout. A defeat to 10 men is never good, especially when you are leading, but on the bright side, Clayton laid an egg. Which didn't please Bagpuss.
'I won't be managed by a woman!' He squealed as he ran off to his rubber wife.
Two days later, Olme welcomed Sparvagen, the owners of the Spar range of shops, and although the first half was a struggle, late goals from that classic duo of PM7 and HD ensured all three points went Ingi Danielsson's way and he at least was happy. The following Thursday, Olme had their first away league match, facing up to Haningealliansen, who as you might expect, don't have that many club songs with their name in. You trying sing we are Haningealliansen, we are Hann... oh feck it.
Andreas Olhman sent the hosts into a ninth minute lead, proving that Olme were not going to get things all their own way. Which was ridiculous. HD soon put paid to that theory with a fine goal on 23 minutes and four minutes after the break WLKRAS bagged the winner. A solid start for an Olme side who have laid down their credentials as early promotion contenders.
Vallentuna provided the entertainment for the Vartan fans in their first competitve home match of the season. It was important to win this game, not just for the fans, but two losses on the trot this early would leave the side floundering and Bert Merton didn't like Flounders. No problems then as Flipsix3 lived up to his bame by hitting the back of the net four times - and by scoring four goals as well - and jim65 proved that even bit part characters can occassionaly get a good line as he bagged a fifth and a five one win was just what the doctor ordered.
The players though wondered just how the hell they were going to keep Flippers quiet for the rest of the week...
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