retired_karamelkel

March 2007

"So how are things now?"

"Well Mr. Chairman, West Ham are now in ninth place with an 11 win, 10 draw and 11 loss record so far."

"That's an improvemen. What brought it about?"

"After O'conner was put on the trainsfer-list, he went on a goal-scoring binge."

"I'm glad to see that he became motivated."

"That he did. I'm worried now that it won't work again. He seems to be a player who has to be prodded to bring out his best."

"I'm sure you can continue to motivate O'Conner."

"I'm not so sure sir. O'Conner is extremely talented, but he tends to choke against the big teams."

"So he fails to perform in big games?"

"Not necessarly big games. If we have a must-win game asgainst a smaller Prem side like say Bolton, then he will perform well. It's games against the Arsenals and Liverpools, regardless od the type of game, where he seemingly disappears."

"Don't start him then against those teams."

"If I do that, then I'm conceding to the world that our highest-paid and franchise player, is in fact, a fraud."

"I see your point."

"Besides sir, the backups wouldn't be much better."

"I see, still the team has improved."

"Yes sir, at least in terms of this season. I'll report back in May, where I'll give you the seson wrap-up."

"Ok, good luck."

retired_karamelkel

May 2007

"Well sir, that's the season."

"How did West Ham do?"

"Finished the year with 13 wins, 12 draws and 13 losses."

"And where in the Prem did you finish?"

"We did crack the top ten, finishing in tenth place."

"That seems to be a bit of a setback."

"Yes sir, it was, but at least we are emerging as a consistant middle table finisher."

"That may be true, but I expected West Ham to improve, not regtress. Mid-table success is all well and good, but the Alliance is expecting a Prem title."

"Yes sir, I realize that, but it is not easy to get top flight Scot and French players to come to a Prem team."

"Why is that?"

"Because they can play in Europe with thier top domestic clubs."

"So, make it into Europe."

"Again, with all due respect sir, it's easier said than done."

"MMM"

"You don't belive me, but check out the Euro qualifiers. They're all big-budget clubs who are under no player rescrictions."

"Well, you and your Alliance partners are to blame for that."

"Yes, I know and we have the moral high ground, but it does make things difficult."

"Deal with it in the offseason."

"Yes Mr.Chairman, that's what I intend to do. See you in July."

<pre class="ip-ubbcode-code-pre">********************************************* ************************************************** * English Premier Division - Sunday 20th May 2007********************************************** ************************************************** ================================================== ============================================== 2006/7 Table============================================= ================================================== =Pos Team Pld Won Drn Lst For Ag Won Drn Lst For Ag Pts--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------1st C Liverpool 38 13 5 1 30 7 11 5 3 29 11 82 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------2nd Man Utd 38 15 3 1 41 10 8 3 8 23 24 75 3rd Chelsea 38 15 4 0 30 6 5 7 7 17 17 71 4th Newcastle 38 11 6 2 33 13 8 3 8 23 21 66 5th Arsenal 38 14 2 3 41 12 6 4 9 16 26 66 6th Fulham 38 13 4 2 31 9 4 4 11 24 34 59 7th Birmingham 38 11 5 3 28 12 3 9 7 13 19 56 8th Bolton 38 11 6 2 26 15 3 4 12 11 25 52 9th Southampton 38 10 5 4 27 11 3 7 9 20 27 51 10th West Ham 38 9 6 4 26 17 4 6 9 18 29 51 11th Leicester 38 10 4 5 22 15 3 5 11 13 28 48 12th Tottenham 38 9 6 4 25 15 3 5 11 18 33 47 13th Charlton 38 8 6 5 31 25 5 2 12 17 30 47 14th Portsmouth 38 10 3 6 38 31 3 2 14 20 40 44 15th Blackburn 38 10 4 5 32 17 2 3 14 11 40 43 16th Leeds 38 8 8 3 22 18 3 2 14 18 37 43 17th Blackpool 38 10 2 7 33 26 2 5 12 10 33 43 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------18th R Man City 38 4 7 8 31 42 5 6 8 35 42 40 19th R Millwall 38 6 5 8 22 26 2 5 12 11 37 34 20th R Watford 38 5 3 11 17 32 1 7 11 12 33 28 ************************************************** ********************************************** West Ham United - Sunday 20th May 2007********************************************** ************************************************** ================================================== ============================================== 2006/7 Senior Club Stats============================================= ================================================== =No Name Apps Gls Con Pens Asts Yel Red MoM Av R--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------13 Alonzo, Jérôme 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Bald, William - - - - - - - - ---- 9 Baldé, Boubacar 23 (2) 5 0 0 2 1 0 0 7.12 1 Bonnefoi, Landry 36 0 40 0 0 0 0 1 7.44 23 Boyack, Steven 6 (6) 0 0 0 1 1 0 0 6.42 24 Brebner, Grant 21 (8) 7 0 0 4 0 0 1 6.93 - Camara, Ibrahima - - - - - - - - ---- - Campbell, Gordon - - - - - - - - ---- - Campbell, Gordon 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Casanova, Patrick - - - - - - - - ---- 14 Collet, Cédric 10 (3) 0 0 0 1 4 1 0 6.38 21 Curren, Lee 2 (3) 0 0 0 0 3 1 0 6.40 - Davidson, John - - - - - - - - ---- - Denquin, Frédéric - - - - - - - - ---- 25 Deroff, Yves 9 (2) 1 0 0 1 0 0 0 7.09 - Diane, Ugo 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Doyle, Jamie - - - - - - - - ---- - Ebonbo, Albin 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 20 Fisher, John 33 7 0 7 (5) 0 4 0 2 7.24 16 Forsyth, Ross 20 0 0 0 3 0 1 0 6.60 17 Giacopelli, Romain 4 (5) 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 6.44 15 Grax, Sébastien 9 (5) 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.79 8 Howie, Willie 27 (3) 2 0 0 4 0 1 0 6.57 6 Innes, Mark 15 (7) 2 0 0 4 3 0 1 6.68 3 Kamara, Abdelhaziz 14 (1) 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 6.67 19 Keogh, Liam 3 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.33 - King, William 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Kisamba, Cédric 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Konaté, Alain 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Le Bris, Ludovic - - - - - - - - ---- - Leray, David 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Malacarne, Franck 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Mathieu, Jérémy 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 7 Mathis, Lionel 21 (3) 6 0 0 4 1 0 1 6.83 - McLaughlin, Kevin 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - McLaughlin, Paul 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Montgomery, Kevin 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 18 Murray, Ian 29 2 0 0 1 5 0 0 6.72 10 O'Connor, Gary 34 7 0 0 4 3 2 2 7.21 5 Planus, Marc 5 (2) 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.29 12 Plessis, Guillaume 7 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 6.43 11 Robson, Barry 33 (2) 4 0 0 4 3 0 2 6.77 - Rodgers, Andy 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 2 Sahnoun, Nicolas 32 3 0 0 0 1 0 1 6.91 4 Stewart, Michael 28 (1) 0 0 0 2 14 0 2 7.00 - Veigneau, Olivier 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Walker, Stephen 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 27 Weir, Graham 12 (4) 1 0 0 1 0 0 1 7.06 - de la Loma, Cédric 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- </pre>

retired_karamelkel

July 2007

"I've had it with you sir!"

"What's the matter?"

"You know damn well what the matter is."

"I don't understand. After all, you now have 36 million pounds to spend on players."

"Ah, but sir, for the second year in a row, you've refused my request to repair the training facilities."

"I simply don't see the need for improved facilities."

"But sir, better facilities means that young players will have a better chance of becoming elite players."

"You can just buy your players."

"Yes I could, but I hate wasting momey."

"So I've noticed. Well, you'll just have to continue using aging infrastructure. You can buy your players."

"Ok sir, just registering my protest. As it is, we just spent 7 million to acquire AMC Moriera."

"Who's he?"

"A player for Lens the last few years. He's been capped at the French B level. He seems to be a great player."

"I'm glad to see you're spending money. Have you increased the wage bill?"

"Yes sir, Moreira is now the highest paid player of my tenure. He gets paid 1.6 million pounds per year. However, the payroll for 50 players is still only 13 million."

"That's one of the lowest wage bills in the Prem. Why don't you spend more on salaries?"

"Because sir, I'm a frugal Scot."

"Ah, use some of that 36 million."

"As I've said earlier, without good facilities, it's impossible to lure top-flight French or Scot players."

"We will continue to disagree on that point. Good luck with the beginning of the season."

"Thamk you, I'll report back in September."

retired_karamelkel

November 2007

"So why the long delay in reporting?"

"Well sir, I didn't want to face your wrath."

"And why would I be displeased?"

"Because sir, West Ham continues to be throughly medicore."

"I see. So what's the record now?"

"Through 13 games, West Ham sits in 9th place with 4 wins, 6 draws and 3 losses."

"So there's been no general improvement."

"No sir, the team seems to have stagnated."

"What's gone wrong this year?"

"Moriera is struggling and O'Conner is inconsistant."

"How about the rest of the team?"

"Inconsistant. The new signings like Milne just aren't working out."

"Wasn't Milne your other big signing of the offseason?"

"Yes sir he was. He cost 5 million pounds from Dundee. The hope was that he would emerge as a good complement to O'Conner."

"That's not working out?"

"No sir, it's not. Milne has yet to score a goal or notch an asist."

"That's pretty paltry."

"Yes, but what's worse is that West Ham lack a killer instinct. About four of those draws came in the second half because we were unable to lockdown the opposition for a half-hour or so. Needless to say, we have yet to achieve a comeback victory this year either."

"So, as usual, West Ham seems to be unable to advance above middling status. Are you worried about your job yet?"

"No sir, but my Alliance partners grow ever more cool about my performance with each passing month."

"Good, I won't lose hope of reclaiming my team."

"You may well get your wish. See you in January."

retired_karamelkel

January 2008

"So what's the record now?"

"Well sir, West Ham is still sitting in 9th place with 9 wins, 9 draws and 8 losses."

"So the team continues to be mediocore."

"I suppose sir."

"I can't imagine that the fans are happy."

"Well, they haven't said much, yet."

"You must be disappointing the Alliance board members."

"Probably sir, but I can't change the team overnight."

"Overnight? You've had six and a half years to change the team. I'm getting tired of mid-table finishes."

"Ah, but sir, your opinion doesn't count."

"One of these days itr might."

"You've no idea sir hoe difficult it is to get relite playeres."

"Just spend your 30 million pounds you have available."

"Ah, but elite French and Scots players don't want to come to a club that finishes in mid-table."

"Well, that's your own damn fault isn't it?"

"I'll assume that's a rhetorical question sir. See you in March. Here's the stats for halway through the Prem season."

<pre class="ip-ubbcode-code-pre">********************************************* ************************************************** * West Ham United - Saturday 22nd December 2007********************************************** ************************************************** ================================================== ============================================== 2007/8 Senior Club Stats============================================= ================================================== =No Name Apps Gls Con Pens Asts Yel Red MoM Av R--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------25 Archibald, Alan 1 (1) 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 7.00 13 Bald, William 3 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 7.33 10 Baldé, Boubacar 8 (3) 2 0 0 1 0 0 1 7.27 1 Bonnefoi, Landry 17 0 17 0 0 0 0 1 7.12 18 Boyack, Steven 1 (2) 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 7.33 24 Brebner, Grant 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.00 - Brown, Martin 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Bruce, Mark - - - - - - - - ---- 7 Camara, Ibrahima 13 (1) 0 0 0 0 1 1 0 6.64 - Campbell, Gordon 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Carlier, Rudy 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Casanova, Patrick - - - - - - - - ---- 26 Collet, Cédric 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 21 Davidson, Callum 9 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 6.56 14 Davidson, John 2 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.50 - Denquin, Frédéric - - - - - - - - ---- 2 Deroff, Yves 2 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 7.00 - Diane, Ugo 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Ebonbo, Albin 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 6 Fisher, John 11 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.91 - Goursat, Eric 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 17 Howie, Willie 4 (2) 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.67 4 Innes, Mark 2 (5) 0 0 0 0 2 0 0 6.57 - King, William 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Kisamba, Cédric 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Konaté, Alain 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 5 Lauchlan, Jim 17 1 0 0 0 7 0 1 7.18 - Leray, David 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Malacarne, Franck 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Mathieu, Jérémy 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 16 Mathis, Lionel 5 (5) 1 0 0 1 0 0 0 6.70 - McLaughlin, Kevin 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - McLaughlin, Paul 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 15 Miller, Lee 3 (1) 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 6.50 19 Milne, Steven 13 (4) 1 0 0 0 1 0 0 6.82 - Montanier, Laurent 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Montgomery, Kevin 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 23 Moreira 16 3 0 0 1 2 0 1 7.00 20 Murray, Ian 9 (2) 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.45 9 O'Connor, Gary 16 5 0 0 1 1 1 2 7.25 22 Plessis, Guillaume 3 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.00 11 Robson, Barry 18 2 0 0 2 0 0 0 6.78 12 Sahnoun, Nicolas 18 0 0 0 1 1 0 0 6.72 8 Stewart, Michael 17 0 0 0 1 4 0 0 7.00 - Tanguy, Christian 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Veigneau, Olivier 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 3 Vosahlo, Anthony 11 (1) 0 0 0 1 3 0 0 7.25 - Weir, Graham 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - de la Loma, Cédric 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- </pre>

retired_karamelkel

March 2008

"This is the off-month isn't it?"

"Yes sir, it has been that over the last couple of years."

"Why is that?"

"Because it's the month that sees Prem teams wraping up Cup competitions."

"Ah"

"Yeah, we're usually eliminated from the silverware hunt by this time. As a result, we only play about three games this month."

"How is West Ham doing?"
"We're holding steady in 9th place still with an 11 win, 11 draw and 9 loss season so far."

"So you haven't managed to improve the team any?"

"No sir, not really."

"Why is that?"

"Inconsistant play. I've finally conceded that O'Conner chokes against 'big' opponants."

"Why does he do that?"

"Damned if I know sir, but he does. The guy simply can't handle playing the likes of Chelsea, Arsenal and the like."

"That's a shame."

"It is sir, O'Conner is a talented player, who should be able play big-time competition, but he can't."

"How are you handling it?"

"I bench him for big games. I've tried subbing him in late against the big boys, but he doesn't do much better. In fact, in two seasons with West Ham. I can recall one gamne out of about 17 against the big five teams."

"That's pretty convincing."

"Yes it is sir."

"How is the rest of the team?"

"Well sir, Milne is proving a bust and we will probably unload him after the year. Jim Lauchan is proving a nice acquistion. Moriera shook off his opening season funk and is playing well. Several reseervists left for other teams before the deadline and Plessis, who can't seem to translate his talent into success will be leaving for Rennes in the summer."

"Ah, good luck in the last 7 games of the seasson. Remember, we probably won't tokerate the mid-table stagnation much longer."

"Thanks for the warning sir, see you at the end of the season."

retired_swimmer1995

Excellent, concise story - really enjoying it. It's very realistic what with West Ham's mid-table medocrity...

retired_karamelkel

Cheers

May 2008

"So how did the year end?"

"Well sir, West Ham finished the season in 10th place with a record of 12 wins, 14 draws, and 12 losses."

"So you dropped a place in the last few games, why?"

"It was a resurgent Arsenal sir. They started the year really bad. dropping into relegation for a bit. Then in the second half they got red-hot and clumbed into the top ten druring the last couple weeks."

"I see, but the fact remains that West Ham remain very medicore."

"I suppose so."

"This has got to change. Use your off-season well or you'll be asked to resign."

"Really sir? The Alliance directors agree?"

"Yes they do. They, like me, want to see the team successful. The difference is that I want to be the sole chairman."

"So, you're still outvoted by two others?"

"No, they've agreed to sell thier shares back to me if you are fired."

"Nice move Mr. Chirman."

"So, be warned and make West Ham a better team in the off-season."

"Yes sir."

<pre class="ip-ubbcode-code-pre">********************************************* ************************************************** * English Premier Division - Thursday 22nd May 2008********************************************** ************************************************** ================================================== ============================================== 2007/8 Table============================================= ================================================== =Pos Team Pld Won Drn Lst For Ag Won Drn Lst For Ag Pts--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------1st C Liverpool 38 16 2 1 36 8 11 4 4 22 11 87 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------2nd Fulham 38 13 4 2 32 16 8 7 4 17 16 74 3rd Chelsea 38 14 3 2 28 6 7 7 5 17 13 73 4th Man Utd 38 12 6 1 40 11 7 4 8 29 29 67 5th Newcastle 38 13 3 3 31 9 5 3 11 22 29 60 6th Blackburn 38 14 2 3 36 16 4 4 11 20 30 60 7th Arsenal 38 10 7 2 33 13 5 2 12 20 34 54 8th Southampton 38 10 4 5 27 18 5 4 10 16 23 53 9th Birmingham 38 9 6 4 26 15 5 4 10 18 29 52 10th West Ham 38 7 7 5 16 13 5 7 7 16 22 50 11th Sunderland 38 12 4 3 31 17 2 4 13 16 36 50 12th Middlesbrough 38 7 5 7 18 12 6 4 9 21 29 48 13th Tottenham 38 8 2 9 24 23 5 4 10 19 29 45 14th Blackpool 38 7 4 8 19 19 4 6 9 16 29 43 15th Leicester 38 8 6 5 22 19 2 6 11 11 29 42 16th Bolton 38 9 5 5 23 19 1 7 11 4 27 42 17th Leeds 38 10 4 5 24 15 1 4 14 7 37 41 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------18th R Charlton 38 5 5 9 27 29 5 5 9 18 29 40 19th R Barnsley 38 8 2 9 28 30 3 3 13 10 24 38 20th R Portsmouth 38 3 9 7 19 25 4 1 14 14 35 31 ************************************************** ********************************************** West Ham United - Thursday 22nd May 2008********************************************** ************************************************** ================================================== ============================================== 2007/8 Senior Club Stats============================================= ================================================== =No Name Apps Gls Con Pens Asts Yel Red MoM Av R--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------25 Archibald, Alan 2 (2) 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 7.25 13 Bald, William 6 (1) 0 5 0 0 0 0 0 6.86 10 Baldé, Boubacar 19 (3) 2 0 0 1 0 0 1 6.91 1 Bonnefoi, Landry 32 0 27 0 0 0 0 1 7.13 18 Boyack, Steven 5 (3) 0 0 0 1 0 1 0 6.88 24 Brebner, Grant 2 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.50 - Brown, Martin 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Bruce, Mark - - - - - - - - ---- 7 Camara, Ibrahima 27 (2) 3 0 0 0 5 1 0 6.72 - Campbell, Gordon 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Carlier, Rudy 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Casanova, Patrick - - - - - - - - ---- 26 Collet, Cédric 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 21 Davidson, Callum 12 0 0 0 0 2 0 0 6.50 14 Davidson, John 3 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 6.00 - Denquin, Frédéric - - - - - - - - ---- 2 Deroff, Yves 8 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 7.13 - Diane, Ugo 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 6 Fisher, John 30 0 0 1 (0) 0 5 0 1 7.10 - Goursat, Eric 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 17 Howie, Willie 7 (7) 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.71 4 Innes, Mark 8 (8) 0 0 0 0 6 0 0 6.56 - King, William 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Kisamba, Cédric 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Konaté, Alain 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 5 Lauchlan, Jim 35 1 0 0 0 9 0 1 6.94 - Malacarne, Franck 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Mathieu, Jérémy 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 16 Mathis, Lionel 6 (12) 3 0 1 (1) 1 0 0 0 6.67 - McLaughlin, Kevin 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - McLaughlin, Paul 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 15 Miller, Lee 8 (2) 0 0 0 1 1 0 0 6.60 19 Milne, Steven 24 (5) 2 0 1 (1) 1 3 0 0 6.86 - Montanier, Laurent 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 27 Montgomery, Kevin 2 0 5 0 0 0 0 0 5.50 23 Moreira 35 7 0 0 2 4 0 4 7.06 20 Murray, Ian 11 (2) 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.46 9 O'Connor, Gary 29 (3) 8 0 0 4 2 1 3 7.28 22 Plessis, Guillaume 4 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 6.00 11 Robson, Barry 35 (1) 4 0 0 3 0 0 1 6.75 12 Sahnoun, Nicolas 32 0 0 0 6 2 1 0 6.81 8 Stewart, Michael 30 0 0 0 1 9 1 0 6.77 - Tanguy, Christian 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - Veigneau, Olivier 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- 3 Vosahlo, Anthony 28 (1) 0 0 0 1 7 0 1 6.93 28 Weir, Graham 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- - de la Loma, Cédric 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ---- </pre>

retired_amgine

Good luck on not getting the sack

What is your average position in the prem?

You've finished like around 10th for few years or so

retired_karamelkel

July 2008

"This is unfair sir."

"No it isn't."

"Yes, it is. First, you once again refuse to upgrade the facilities, meaning West Ham continues to use dilapidated equipment and facilities, but now you've ordered me to achieve European qualification."

"Yes, we have. The directors have no wish to pay for an expensive upgrade when the team's performance doesn't warrant it. Additionally, we feel that West Ham is capable of reaching Europe next season. So, we are enjoining you to be, for once, successful."

"That's not my only complaint sir, you paid the stockholders 7 million pounds."

"Well, they aren't seeing succes on the field, so a little pocket money will keep them happy."

"That's seven million less in the transfer budget."

"Why should it matter? You never spend money on players."

"This year sir, I have no choice."

"Oh really?"

"Yes sir, I've opened the checkbook this summer. West Ham accquired Scotland left back Stephen Crainey for 8.5 million pounds from Newcastle. We've purchased veteran sytriker Gabe Mamadou from Rennes for 3 million. He actually begins his second tour of duty with West Ham. We signed goalkeeper Jamie Langfield from Norwich for 6 million pounds and derfender Syvain Discan for 900K. All these players will be first team regulars next season. In addition, we spent 2.5 million pounds on youth prospects."

"I see, you really did open the chequebook. Did you see the article in the Yelegraph this morning?"

"No sir, I aviod the London papers."

"They had a sports article about how West Ham supporters are expecting their team to have a good year after spending 23 million pounds on players in the offseason."

"Ah, I'd heard about the article, but declined to comment."

"There are high expectations among even the fans. You had best succeed."

"Well sir, we just wrapped up a six game preaeason schedule. We went 5 and 1, losing only to Everton at Goodison. The wins were against a mixture of League teams not in the Prem."

"That's good to hear. I only hope the winning carries over to the regular season."

"We wiil try sir."

"For your sake, you had best win."